I am not sure how to start this post as I have so much to say and it all seems not adequate enough for what my heart is feeling. My journey with the Lord started in the womb as I was created to love Him. The expression of that love grew as I grew and began to understand this nearness and oneness with Him I thought was a normal part of life. My heart opened up to Him fully at age five and at age six through the act of baptism I solidified my relationship with Him to those around me. It was as natural as breathing for me to become one in heart and spirit with Him. At the age of 13, at a time when I began to grow into adulthood and felt the pressures of being a teenager I again solidified to those around me my relationship with Him. Throughout my teenage and young adult years I tried to do what I felt He was telling me to do and I consistently felt His leading and His heart for me. He was always there during the good times and the hard times to comfort me and pull me out of the pit I continued to find myself in. Although those times were special and His presence was very real I felt there was something missing. I would read my Bible and encounter men and women of God who were overcomers. Who consistently walked in miracles, healings, and encounters with God. Who had faith that moved mountains and brought peace and restoration to their lives. I did not see that happening in my life, even though I knew God’s love and His presence. The yearning in my heart for more grew and grew and I could not be satisfied with life as it was. It was then God gave me an understanding of the baptism of the Holy Spirit that changed my life forever. He showed me that although I had the Holy Spirit living inside of me, He did not have all of me. If I gave Him control of all of me, then I would begin to live the life I wanted. The act of giving all of me to the Holy Spirit was an easy one; the act of living it out was another story. I had lived independently for so long, making all of my decisions out of places of the hurt and pain of my experiences. Although I used the principles I found within the Bible to place boundaries on my decisions, those decisions were still mine and not His. It was hard for me to go to Him first trusting He had my best interest in mind. However each time I did the results were amazing. I continued to fight Him on certain issues but He was always faithful to allow me to make mistakes and run back to Him to fix it, and He always did. I am not sure why He did, but it spoke to my heart and eventually I learned He was safe. My life has not been an easy one, I feel I have been through hell and back many times, but He has always been there going to hell and back with me, restoring me back to life and wholeness.
How do you say thank you to a God who has healed you, delivered you, restored you, protected you, defended you, comforted you, empowered you, put up with you, befriended you, parented you, unconditionally loved you, favored you, held you, gave life to you, and always believes in you.
Words are not enough!
I want to begin to blog about God’s goodness and all the things He has done for me over the years. My heart is over flowing with thankfulness and I want to express that thankfulness as best as I can. Feel free to add the ways in which you are thankful to the comments.
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