The Fear of the Lord

There have been many times as a single mom of three teenage daughters that I have felt overwhelmed by the circumstances of life. Loneliness is a constant when you are trying to provide for your family, make all the decisions and feel there is no one to turn to who can help or understand. I do go to God, because I know He is powerful and I want to live under the fear of the Lord; but there have been many times where I have wondered if He really heard me or if He really knew how I was feeling. When the car breaks down, the child support doesn’t get deposited causing checks to bounce, one of the kids comes home with a zero because she did not turn in her homework, there is no food in the pantry, and the toilet overflows all in one week, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and wonder if I can take one more thing.

I remember a particularly hard time when I was working part time at Kohl’s making $7 an hour. I had started school in order to get a degree where I could get a better job and was taking a full load of classes. For reasons beyond my control the child support I had been receiving was cut about $300 and I was trying to raise three children and having trouble making ends meet. The children had been provided with TennCare and so family and friends were encouraging me to file for food stamps also. This was hard for me because I was always taught that we should allow God to take care of us and that it was not the role of government to meet our needs. I felt if I went to the government for help I was not allowing God to take care of me. I felt I would not be living under the fear of the Lord. However, I got so desperate I went ahead and applied for the food stamps all the while wondering if God knew how desperate we really were. God seem to be ignoring my circumstance and it felt as if He really did not know what I was going through.

Do you ever feel that way? Are there times when there is not enough money to go around. Is peace something you use to have with your spouse? Does it seem the kids are always sick or coming down with something? Do you ever look to the ceiling and say, “Are you there? Do you know that I can’t pay my mortgage this month? Do you hear me?” Is the future a scary place for you to think about? Do you have trouble recognizing or feeling God’s presence in your life?

I’m reminded of the movie the Pursuit of Happiness that starred Will Smith. The movie was based on a true story, if anybody ever felt overwhelmed at the circumstances of their life this man must have. I want you to take a look at this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z95wF2Cdye4&feature=PlayList&p=2AFA59EA4F67E6F6&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=35

Maybe your circumstances are not as overwhelming as his, or occurring to the same degree, but we all have those times when we do have to deal with life and all it brings and the questions bombard our minds as to whether God really cares.

What would you give to know there is a solution to your problems? To know that you don’t have to worry about the future or even five minutes down the road or to be able to help others find solutions and not worry about tomorrow. Would that make your life easier and happier? What if I told you I found the secret to living life in peace without worry or stress, would you like to know what it is?

If I could sum up Psalm 34 into one sentence it would be, the fear of the Lord creates hope. Hope is the very thing we need when we are feeling overwhelmed. Did you see the promises found in this chapter? God promises that He is always there for us, He knows what is going on with us, and He helps us when we are in trouble. Yea, you say those are good promises, but how can I really know He will do that for me, especially when I don’t see it happening or feel Him near me.

I think we can look at Psalm 34 as a type of recipe for us to follow to help us understand and benefit from the statement “the fear of the Lord creates hope”. This recipe gives us clear and concise instructions to follow and promises good results all along the way. It is one of those portions of Scripture that clearly says if we do this then God will do that. The focus of Psalm 34 seems to be the fear of the Lord.

So what is the fear of the Lord? For some the fear of the Lord can sound a little scary, giving the impression that God wants them to be afraid of Him; but that is not what it is at all. It actually has nothing to do with being afraid. Yes, it is a place of awe, reverence, and understanding that He is greater than us, but it is so much more than that. It is a place of intimacy and relationship with God. He wants to be near us, to be in close relationship with us.

With a closer look at the chapter we can see the first few verses are all about worshiping and praising God. David was a man after God’s own heart, he knew how to praise God and he did it with all his might. So for David to begin a Psalm that focuses on the fear of the Lord with worship tells me that praise is a large part of the fear of the Lord. As we go on down through this chapter we will see it is more about relationship and obedience than fear.

In verse 4, the amplified version states that David sought and required of the Lord, “out of necessity and on the authority of His Word.” David would not have been able to understand his place with God as a son and feel confident in approaching the Throne of God for his needs unless he had a close relationship with Him. David started this chapter with worship because it is out of worship and praises that relationship and obedience can grow. In Psalm 73:25, Asaph also talks about this relationship with God, when he says, “Whom have I in heaven but You? And I have no delight or desire on earth besides you.” I believe Asaph was saying nothing makes him happy and can satisfy him here on earth like God, he had nothing else. Also in Matthew 7:7 it shows us how we as God’s children should approach His throne with our needs. “Keep on asking and it will be given you; keep on seeking and you will find; keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you.” When you continue to ask of Him, seek Him, and knock on His door, which I equate to reminding Him of His promises, it builds relationship with Him. That is what He wants, because it is out of relationship that we come to know who He really is and want to obey Him, and it is out of obedience that we truly step into who we were created to be in the first place, imitators of Christ.

Starting in verse 11 and going through verse 22 of Psalm 34, David, under the influence of the Holy Spirit, teaches us what it means to live by the statement “the fear of the Lord creates hope”. Within these verses I found 10 different ingredients for our recipe that will help us produce hope in the midst of our circumstances. By applying these 10 things to our lives we can know hope and find ourselves living under the fear of the Lord. So let’s take a look at the 10 things I found.

1. In verse 13, we see our first ingredient. David instructs us not to speak evil and deceitful things. This is very self explanatory but did you know that it also includes not speaking evil about yourself? When we say things like I will never be good enough to do that, or I always fail, we are speaking evil of ourselves. Proverbs 18:21 says “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it (for death or life).” Also Deut. 30:19 says “I call heaven and earth to witness this day against you that I have set before you life and death, the blessings and the curses; therefore choose life that you and your descendants may live.” God gives us the choice to live or die, to have blessings or cursings invade our lives, and to impact the future lives of our descendants with the same. It is up to us to choose and the principalities of heaven both angelic and demonic are waiting for our choice. In the first part of Deut, it says “I call heaven and earth to witness this day against you”, it is your choice; do you want blessings or cursings? What will you choose?

2. The next ingredient is found in verse 14, as David says stay away from evil and do good. Another self explanatory passage. We all know the difference between good and evil and how to live morally within our community; but I think again this also has to do with ourselves. There are things we allow to creep into our lives and call good that in reality are evil. We have to be very vigilant in seeking God’s idea of good and rejecting everything else.

3. Verse 14, gives us another ingredient for our recipe. David says to pursue peace. This means to crave it, go after it! I like the way the amplified version spells it out in I Peter 3:11b – “…. Let him search for peace (harmony; undisturbedness from fears, agitating passions, and moral conflicts) and seek it eagerly. [Do not merely desire peaceful relations with God, with your fellowmen, and with yourself, but pursue, go after them!]”

4. In verse 15, we see David telling us not to compromise in doing right and what we believe is right. The amplified version states, “The eyes of the Lord are toward the (uncompromisingly) righteous.” When I think of the eyes of the Lord looking at me, I think of intimacy, you know like when a man and woman who love each other look into each other’s eyes and seem to be oblivious to everything else going on around them. I want Jesus to look at me that way, so that leads me to want to never compromise what I know to be right.

5. Also in verse 15, David says for us to “cry out to the Lord believing He will hear us”. Although this part of the verse also implies not compromising so that the Lord will hear us; I also believe an important underlying aspect is knowing, believing, and trusting that when we cry out to Him, He will hear us. Because He says He will hear, we can know He will hear. Sometimes just knowing He is there and hears my cry is all I need. I don’t always have to have an answer; there are times when just knowing someone is hearing me is enough.

6. The sixth ingredient is found in verse 17. David tells us to cry out to the Lord, but this time we cry to Him knowing He will deliver us. This is another place of trusting that no matter what our circumstances look like He is delivering us from ALL our troubles and distresses. Verse 12 of Psalm 34 gives the indication that living a long and good life comes from living under the fear of the Lord. In I Peter 3:10, this verse is repeated. In the amplified version the first part of the verse says, “him who wants to enjoy life and see good days (good – whether apparent or not).” This statement is very important in that Peter is saying we may not always see things as being good for us, but God knows they really are. We want to enjoy life and see good days, but sometimes our perception of what good is can be very different than God’s perception of good. This is where trusting Him to deliver us becomes the issue.

7. The next ingredient is found in verse 18. This scripture has a lot to say but I think the main point that David is trying to make is we need to be repentant over our sin. When we humbly recognize our sin and confess it, the Lord draws close to us. If you want to know the presence of the Lord in your life, you must be willing to come into agreement with God about the sin in your life and confess it. The closeness of His presence is an amazing thing to experience after doing some internal house cleaning.

8. Verse 19 tells us that if we are consistently doing what is right without wavering (amplified version) that any evil that comes against us the Lord will deliver us from them all. So the ingredient we can use from this verse is to be consistent in our walk.

9. The ninth ingredient comes out of verse 22, when David tells us to take refuge in the Lord. Verse 8 goes right along with this and the amplified version says “Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) is the man who trusts and takes refuge in Him.” I think it is interesting that the amplified expounds on the word blessed using the term envied because as we can also see in Romans 11:11, Israel will come to God because they will be jealous of what we have. This is what it says, “So I ask, Have they stumbled so as to fall? By no means! But through their false step and transgression salvation [has come] to the Gentiles, so as to arouse Israel [to see and feel what they forfeited] and so to make them jealous.” So taking refuge in the Lord not only blesses our lives but can influence the lives of God’s chosen people as well. So there are purposes beyond just our life for our obedience and relationship with God.

10. The last ingredient that I found for our recipe is also in verse 22. David tells us to trust in the Lord. He says that if we trust, the Lord will redeem our lives and we will not be condemned or held guilty. When I think of redemption here, I feel it is talking about all the times we have messed up and walked away from our destiny. David is saying no matter how far away we find ourselves God won’t condemn us or cause us to feel guilty. As we trust in Him he will continue to redeem all those places and bring us back on track to what we were created for.

As we have seen, it is as if these verses provide for us an umbrella of protection from the evil in the world. Living under the fear of the Lord, and living in relationship and obedience to Him releases all the promises in His Word over our lives and brings us life. This is a simple yet profound chapter in that it specifically states for us how living under the fear of the Lord provides for every one of our needs, problems, or worries to be met within the promises of God. If we follow the recipe He has laid out for us we can be sure of the manifestation of His promises and a decrease in needs, problems, or worries we will face in life. Our recipe is laid out and we have all the ingredients we need. The next step will be to put all the ingredients together, and live our lives based on the belief that the fear of the Lord creates hope.

So, what does this mean for our daily life as we face fears, disappointment, sorrow, or frustration? Remember how I told you that I got so desperate that I applied for food stamps. Well let me tell you the rest of the story. I did not get the food stamps, but out of the blue the case worker ask me if I had any doctor bills that I had not told her about, because if I did I might qualify for TennCare for myself. I did not have insurance and really did not think I needed it, but I figured it was worth a try. So I told her I had an orthodontist bill for one of my children. When she figured it in, I was $5 over the amount needed to be able to receive TennCare. So, although I did not get food stamps that day I left with medical insurance coverage for myself for a year. The best part about that is within that year I had to be taken to the emergency room several times with pain in my stomach and eventually had to have my gallbladder taken out, all of which was paid for 100% by the insurance. I like to say it was paid for by God not the government because He knew it was coming and took care of it even before I knew I needed it. God also provided for my daughter and I to go to Africa later that year for which I needed insurance and it was again already available and covered before I ever knew I would need it. I think God is just waiting for us to cooperate with Him so He can bless us and so we won’t have to worry or be anxious over circumstances. So how are you going to cooperate with God?

If you look back at the 10 ingredients in our recipe there is always a promise that goes along with each ingredient that seems to take care of any problem we might have. Let’s look at a few of them. Verse 15 and 17 says when you cry to him His eyes see you, His ears hear you, and He will deliver you from all your distresses and troubles. Verse 18 speaks of His salvation when you are crushed down from sin and the circumstances of life. Again in verse 19 He delivers you from every place the enemy would try to come against you. Also, if you look at some of the other verses within the chapter you see His deliverance from all fear in verse 4; His protection for you in verse 7; and His provision for you in verses 9 and 10. So, by following these simple ingredients you can form your life based on the belief that “the fear of the Lord creates hope.”

Through worship, prayer, faith, relationship and obedience you can know the fear of the Lord and His provision, protection, and peace that come with it. The fear of the Lord is not just words that are vague and hard to understand. The fear of the Lord is practical, tangible love acted out between God and you. Are you ready to apply the recipe of God’s Word of your life? I challenge you to take these ingredients and put them to the test, and experience the peace that living by the belief that “the fear of the Lord creates hope” can bring.

If we were to live our lives based on the belief that “the fear of the Lord creates hope”, what would our lives look like? I Peter 3:11b tells us that it looks like peace which is harmony; undisturbedness from fears, agitating passions, and moral conflicts. What does peace look like to you? Is that something you would want for your life? What about for your city, region, or nation?

Can you imagine a world where every Christian lived with that kind of peace, fully trusting in the faithfulness of God and His promises, reverently and worshipfully fearing the Lord; living out their lives based on the belief that “the fear of the Lord creates hope?” It is hard to imagine what that would look like, but I think this next video gives us some idea. By the way the events in this video are actually taking place in the world right now. Take a look at this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbddQNQ91SA

What you do within your own life today can have a lasting impact on the world in the future. It starts with you today, will you pick up the recipe of His Word and apply these ingredients to your life and experience the same change in your life that the world is experiencing today? It is your choice, will you live your life from the belief that “the fear of the Lord creates hope?”

Grace

The grace of the Lord is a mysterious thing. I feel as though it has been extended to me in abundance throughout my lifetime. I have seen it expressed as favor, restitution, redemption, and freedom, as well as many other things. For some reason beyond my comprehension God has pour out His grace on my life in ways I never dreamed He would or could do. It has taught me so much about His nature and His love. I do not know where I would be without Him. His grace IS sufficient!

God’s grace for me has been one of salvation, redemption, healing, restoration, and provision. Grace encompasses so much and has been a part of my life for so long that it has become a personal friend and help. I believe grace is not only given to us for salvation but is also a mantle we can wear no matter what we are facing. It has been my experience in life that “I can do all things through Christ….because His grace is sufficient” to me. I know for my own life it has always been there even from day one especially for healing and protection.

I have always been pretty stubborn, I know a portion of it comes from my Irish/Scottish/ Indian/German lineage, but also I feel it is from feeling the need to take care and look out for myself at a young age. Whether this need was just perceived or real is hard to say, but it was there and it felt very real. As an infant it became quickly apparent to my mother that I was not a healthy baby. I say mother because I don’t have very many memories of my father, as a child, he just was not there, and he left all together when I was four. According to her, as I have no memory of this, I almost died several times because my throat would begin to close up and I would just quit breathing. The doctors soon found out I had many allergies to the point that out of 80 foods I could only eat 8. I was also allergic to animals, dust, grass, and many other things.

Clearly, I was not born to live for very long in this world and have felt like a stranger from as early as I can remember. Many nights my mother would sit up with me all night elevating my head so I could breathe. She has told me that one night after being up with me every night for two weeks, she was so tired she could not stay awake and she kept waking up to me gasping for air. She was so desperate and exhausted she was sobbing and she told God she could not do it anymore and she thanked Him for giving me to her for the short time she had me. She said she knew I would not last through the night, as my breathing had gotten so bad and she knew she could not stay awake. She said right then she gave me back to God and expected me to die sometime during the night. Obviously I did not die, and the Lord graciously allowed me to live for a reason.

A few years ago Jesus was taking me through a time of healing and showed me eight other times in my lifetime where I came very close to death. Not only did I have severe allergies as an infant, but I fell out of a car when I was five. I had chronic bladder and kidney infections as a child, and I had an ovarian cyst to burst when I was 14 which led to a 2 ½ ounce pool of blood gathering behind my bladder. Unfortunately it was not found until it had gangrene in it and the doctors were amazed that it had not already poisoned my body. I was in a car accident when I was 16 where the car literally dropped, not rolled, down a 15 foot embankment. I had another car accident when I was 17 as another car pulled out in front of me and I slammed into them. After a failed marriage in my thirties I became so depressed that I came very close to killing myself. Then a few years ago after having severe pain and not being able to keep anything on my stomach for almost a month, I had surgery to take out my gallbladder. After removing it the doctor said my gallbladder was so bad it had already began to petrify and was as hard as a rock. It had also begun to poison my body and he could not believe I was not worse. Once God had reminded me of all these incidents He took me back to each one and showed me where I believed lies about Him. He wanted to show me that He was there at every incident and His grace was protecting me from the hand of the enemy.

I am not sure the enemy really knows my purpose here on earth but I think he has an idea. I figure as long as I don’t know the full extent of my purpose neither does he and that means if God, who knows everything, is on my side, I will always be one step ahead of the enemy, walking in whatever God has for me, and I will always be protected from anything the enemy wants to throw at my life until my purpose here on earth is complete and God calls me home to Him. I feel very thankful for the grace of God that has been very evident within my life.

Encounters With God - Part 2

So far this year I have had five significant encounters with God. Through worship, intercession, and soaking He has spoken to me, showed me His heart, and led me in intercession to help birth His purposes here on earth. The unusual thing about this is last year I probably only had about five significant encounters with God all year long. So why is this year different? Well, it could be many reasons and I won’t presume to know the thoughts of God, however, I can say I am pursuing Him more this year than I have in the past. He does say in James 4:8 that if we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us. So maybe that has a little to do with it. All I know is I will continue to pursue Him and expect Him to do the same.

In the last post I talked about an encounter I had on January 23^rd where Jesus showed up with a flaming sword and cut me down the middle in order to divide between my soul and my spirit while Hebrews 11:6 was flashing before my eyes and pounding in my ears. After much thought and discussion with Him I feel I understand the correlation between the two verses He was trying to bring to light in my vision.

Hebrews 4:12 (amplified) says, “For the Word that God speaks is alive and full of power [making it active, operative, energizing, and effective]; it is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating to the dividing line of the breath of life (soul) and [the immortal] spirit, and of joints and marrow [of the deepest parts of our nature], exposing and sifting and analyzing and judging the very thoughts and purposes of the heart.”

Hebrews 11:6 (amplified) says, “But without faith it is impossible to please and be satisfactory to Him. For whoever would come near to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He is the rewarder of those who earnestly and diligently seek Him [out].”

These two verses at first glance seem to not be related at all, however, these were the two God gave me while in the midst of my vision. So further research must be in order to fully grasp what God was trying to convey to me.

Obviously the sword that penetrated and cut me in half was the Word of God not only symbolically in the form of a sword but also in the person of Jesus as the wielder of that sword. John 1:1, “In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God”; John 1:14, “And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.”

As the sword cut through me I heard God say, “I am dividing between your soul and your spirit” and Hebrews 11:6. He “spoke” both references of Scripture at the same moment. Hebrews 4:12 says, “the Word that God speaks is alive….” As God was cutting me in two He was speaking both Hebrews 4:12 and Hebrews 11:6 over me. So it would appear that it was the Words of these verses that were dividing between my soul and spirit causing my flesh to be lowered enough for me to have a glimpse of God’s heart.

So what is it in Hebrews 11:6 that is alive and active and penetrates to the very thoughts and purposes of my heart? Is it faith in God, belief that He exists?

Remember I kept feeling my worship was not good enough, that it was somehow dirty, and all about me and not Him. I did not feel I was able to please Him or be satisfactory to Him in my worship. I never felt condemnation in this revelation, but it was more a matter of fact. That the truth that He is so big, so great, there was no way my worship could ever compare.

Jeff, my pastor, has said time and time again it takes God to get us to God. We can’t know Him or draw near to Him unless He comes to us first. This is what He was doing in me, giving me the faith I needed to be satisfactory to Him, so He could show me a glimpse of His heart. I had to have enough belief in who He is in order to draw near to Him, but in my own state of imperfection and unbelief I cannot do that and be as close as He wants me to be with Him. So in that moment He gave it to me.

As I seek Him out and discover who He is the more capacity I have to hold the amount of faith it takes to satisfy His holiness and the more He is drawn to me. Then one day He steps in front of me and says I love you so much that I am going to help you in your pursuit of me by giving you a little more faith so you can get a glimpse of my heart, and then you will seek me even more. The more I come to know God the more I realize there is so much more to know. I can’t help but continue my journey of discovery of Him because it satisfies the deepest places inside of me.

Encounters With God

At church on Sunday, January 23, 2011, during worship I had an encounter with God. I felt His presence very heavy and was trying to worship but I just could not seem to get the words out. It somehow felt as if the words of the songs weren’t good enough. The heaviness increased and I asked God what was going on and over and over again I heard Him say, “I am dividing between your soul and your spirit” and the Scripture reference of Hebrews 11:6 seemed to be flashing before my eyes and pounding in my ears. Just then the heaviness turned into a burning on the inside of me.

I thought Hebrews 11:6 might have been the Scripture that talks about the Word of God being a sword that divides between soul and spirit as I knew it was located in the book of Hebrews. So I reached for the closest Bible and looked it up. Hebrews 11:6 says, “Without faith it is impossible to please God, for whoever comes near to God must believe that He exists and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.” At the time putting together this Scripture with what God was saying was too difficult; however I have since gained revelation on what He was trying to say to me and I will write about that a little later.

All the while the burning continued and was increasing to the point that I was feeling very uncomfortable. So I ask God why it felt as though my insides were burning up. Just then I saw Jesus standing in front of me with a flaming sword in His hands. He then held the sword up in front of me and brought it down on me cutting me in half. At that moment I felt as if I were going to completely burn up from the inside out. I instantly received what seemed to be a five second glimpse of the spirit realm and God’s heart.

At this revelation my heart felt as if it was going to explode and I would die right there. I don’t know of any other way to explain it except in physical terms which doesn’t seem adequate enough. My heart felt as if it was going to burst, my whole body felt engulfed in flames, and at the same time I felt my worship of Him was not good enough and would never be good enough, almost dirty in comparison to Him. It did not feel condemning in any way, it just was. It was as if He was accepting it even though it paled in comparison to Him and would never truly be adequate. Somehow I knew it was because He loved that I was attempting it anyway.

As I got that small glimpse of God’s heart it seemed as though my worship was more about me than it was about Him; more about me getting a feeling or knowing that I had met with God; more about what I wanted to get from Him rather than what He wanted from me. So I asked Him how He wanted me to worship Him.

By this time I was visibly being touched, shaking and crying. A lady standing next to me must have noticed and she put her hand on my back so I naturally placed my hand on her back. As soon as I touched her she began crying and I could tell God was touching her as well. It seemed as though she was feeling the same thing I was so I knew He wanted me to worship Him by praying for her to experience Him in the same way I did.

I begin to pray (not out loud, so as to not pull her out of what God was doing in her) for the same sword to cut her in two dividing between soul and spirit so she could get a glimpse of God’s heart for her. As I stood there praying over her she was visibly being touched by God to the point of being overwhelmed. I then felt the Lord telling me to move on to another person, so I did. This continued to happen with person after person until I looked back and they were all so overwhelmed by His presence they were kneeling on the floor. I was amazed at how just one glimpse of His heart could impact lives so distinctly. The more I think I know who God is, the more I realize I don’t know Him at all. Since that morning I have felt a closeness to God that is noticeably different than before. There is also a feeling of awe that I cannot describe that continues to pull me toward Him wanting to know Him even more!